Are You Stuck in Struggletown? Or Asking How Do I Find Myself Again?

Are You Stuck in Struggletown? Or Asking How Do I Find Myself Again?

Struggletown. We’ve all been there. Some of us might even live there more often than we’d care to admit. It’s that place where everything feels overwhelming, like you’re constantly running on empty, pouring from not just an empty, but a bone-dry cup. And somehow, you’re still functioning just enough to try and keep EVERYONE else’s needs met. Sound familiar?

Our daily lives have become SO damn busy and it's getting harder to find the pause button :-(

In the first episode of 2025 on the Nourish Connect Thrive podcast, Kelly and I sat down to talk about this very concept. We reflected on the chaos of the year gone by, the tolls leading a busy life can have on you, the weight of invisible loads we carry and our own missed opportunities to reset when we really needed it most. We also asked the question:

“What if we didn’t need to wait until a new year, a holiday, or an external milestone to hit the reset button? What if every single day, or even every moment could be a fresh start?”

If you’re nodding along, feeling the pull of your own Struggletown reality, this post is for you. Let’s explore how we can leave Struggletown behind, one courageous, baby step at a time.

Afterall, aren't we all just chasing a beautiful life and a glimmer of hope?

The Invisible Load and Why It’s Weighing You Down

In our conversation, we touched on Dr. Libby Weaver’s work, particularly her insights from her book The Invisible Load. She captures the struggle so many women face in a way that feels all too real:

"When we’re so busy doing everything for everyone else, it’s easy to lose sight of our own needs. Over time, this invisible load builds up, quietly eroding our joy and vitality."

Think about that for a moment. How often do you prioritise everyone else’s needs above your own? How often do you reach the end of your day feeling depleted, scattered, wondering why you feel so drained and disconnected from yourself? That’s the invisible load at work, quietly but relentlessly chipping away at your energy, your peace and your sense of self.

Why New Year Resolutions Don’t Work (and what to do instead)

Kelly and I kicked off the episode talking about the tradition of “New Year’s Resolutions” and the common belief that the dawn of the new year has the potential to 'change everything.'

It’s tempting, isn’t it? Feeding into the narrative of being presented with a clean slate, a chance to “fix everything,” motivated by a desire to become a new, improved version of yourself. 

But as Kelly so eloquently pointed out:"Most of the time, those New Year’s resolutions or the reset happens for about a month, and then they just peter away… life happens, and they go nowhere."

Why? Because life isn’t linear. And often, those grand resolutions are so big and overwhelming that they’re impossible to sustain when real life, with all its twists, turns, and unexpected demands kicks back in.

Instead of pinning all your hopes on a “new year, new me” strategy, what if you changed your belief systems and embraced the idea of MICRO RESETS?

What if you paused not just once a year, but daily or even moment to moment, to ask yourself how you’re really feeling, what you truly need, and what small daily steps you can take to honour yourself right NOW? In this moment or any moment.

Finding Joy amongst the Chaos

The truth is, Struggletown isn’t just about exhaustion. It’s about the absence of joy and play.

As Kelly shared during the podcast:"When I sit with myself in moments of overwhelm, the number one thing that comes up is: I just want to feel joy again."

For me, joy looks like carving out time to write, just for me, from my soul, without the pressure of perfection. For Kelly, it’s those little rituals that make her feel alive and connected. What does joy look like for you? Have you lost touch with what lights you up? Maybe it’s time to take an initial step to pause and reconnect with the things that truly nourish your soul, help you regain direction in life and feel more like YOU again. 

The Power of Asking Questions

In Struggletown, the hustle, grind and challenging life experiences often drown out our own inner voice. We forget to check in with ourselves, to ask the big questions that bring clarity.

Kelly shared one of her favourite tools for self-awareness during the episode:"What do I actually want right now? It’s such a simple question, but for so many women, it’s one of the hardest ones to answer."

It doesn't have to be a complex process; it can be as simple as stopping for a moment to ask ourselves this question, "What do I want?"

When we ask this, we often uncover surprising answers. It’s not always about big, life-changing decisions. Sometimes, it’s as simple as wanting five minutes of peace, a walk in the sunshine, or connecting with our own courage to say no to things that don’t serve us.

Every Day (and every moment) Is a Reset

The beauty of life is that it’s constantly offering us opportunities to reset. It doesn’t have to be tied to January 1st or some future milestone. It can happen in the most ordinary of moments.

As Kelly put it:"We’ve navigated many times where the waves are just crashing against you, and it feels like you’re in a tumble, like you’re in a washing machine. But what if, instead, you were floating on a peaceful, flowing river? What if you chose to ride the waves with ease and flow rather than fighting against them?"

Each moment is an invitation to take off the heavy jacket of overwhelm, to pause and ask: 

“What do I need right now?” Even if it’s something small like taking a deep breath, or having a glass of water, or creating a moment of stillness, it’s a step toward leaving Struggletown and finding your way back to YOU.

Your Inner Compass: The Four Aspects of Self

One of the tools we love using and exploring the idea of is the four aspects of self: mind, body, heart and soul. Each of these parts plays a vital role in how we experience life, and each one has its own unique needs.

Kelly explained it beautifully:"Sometimes, it’s your body that’s screaming for attention. Sometimes, it’s your heart that’s asking to be heard. And other times, it’s your soul or your mind that needs space to breathe. The key is to tune in and ask:

“What do I need at this moment? Which part of me is calling for nourishment right now?”

When you begin to honour each part of yourself, you create space for healing, growth and ultimately… JOY. 

Your Road Map Out of Struggletown

If you’re feeling stuck in Struggletown, know this: you’re not alone. We’ve been there too, and we’ve found that the path out isn’t about huge leaps or overnight transformations. It’s about;

• Micro moments of awareness

• Honesty

• Self-compassion

• Courageous daily steps 

As we embark on this new year, let’s leave behind the pressure of grand resolutions and instead embrace the gentle power of daily resets. Let’s ask ourselves the questions that matter, reconnect with what truly lights us up and create space for joy and ease, even in the chaos.

"So make this year, 2025, about exploring you." – Anna

"Try things on for size. If it doesn’t fit, take off that heavy jacket. Keep driving, keep going, and find what works for you." – Kelly

The road out of Struggletown is paved with curiosity, self-compassion and the courage to prioritise yourself. You deserve to feel nourished, connected and alive. So take that first step today that will ultimately help you to embrace the thrive that follows. 

Join Us on the Journey! 

If this resonates with you, we invite you to join our upcoming FREE webinar

From Exhausted to Empowered: Discover Your Path Back to You. 

Together, we’ll explore how to navigate life’s chaos with more ease, flow and self-compassion.

Remember, every moment is a chance to reset. Let’s discover our own moments -  together 💛